." the councilor started.Kandra held up his large furred paw stopping the male. Narrowing his eyes at the male he said, "Think well on the next words ...hat leave your throat."Nodding the male was silent a few moments, "I remove what I said sire. It was not my intent to insult you nor your decisions." The male then stood silent fully aware that he very life was in peril.Kandra watched the male for a moment, gauging whether or not the male had spoken the truth. Finally satisfied Kandra nodded. "It. I have issued my full apology so many times. The guilt still burns in me. There is just enough fuel in my mind to keep it going. But I don’t want to spend my life in misery over choices I have made. I suffered through many years, and I believe I’ve paid for my sins against you. Still, there you are, dominating my thoughts. Today, when my life has settled, when my nest is complete, and I have time to think, I spend most of my extra time thinking about you. There is a part of me that longs to. ‘Okay, well now we need to work out what we can refrigerate and sell tomorrow and what is going to the convent for the homeless run they do.’ Jenny seemed pretty impressed I had an arrangement for the out of date stock. I explained how Sister Angela-Mary, the Mother Superior, had come to me and asked for my help. I liked her at first meeting and was glad to join her band of suppliers. I’m not at all religious but her faith and enthusiasm got me straight away. Jenny nodded and we set too. Soon. I turned, facing my room, leaning back against door. I started crying, sliding to the floor. I pulled my legs up underneath my chin, quietly sobbing. Why was this happening? Why am I crying? I stood up, wiping my face on my sleeve and started looking for a good shirt that didn’t have a stain on it. I slipped on a pair of jeans lying on the end of my bed. I grabbed the jacket the social worker had gotten me to meet my adoptive parents. My parents had died while I was younger and my Uncle raised.
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